24 Hilarious Names for Small Businesses

Tequila Mockingbird

According to the small business insurance service platform Simply Business, a funny business name may increase revenue. The website surveyed over 2,000 British small business customers, with over half admitting they were more likely to visit a business with a funny title and 65% saying the funny name showed the business positively.

These are some of the quirkiest small business names we’ve seen.

1. Spex in the City: Optometrists

Optometrist, Eye Doctor
Image Credit: Public Domain/Wiki Commons.

The coolest part of this business name is that when pedestrians walk by on Main Street, they will have to double-take, wondering if their eyes deceive them. The only drawback to “Spex in the City” as a business name is its cost — unless the owner wants to have an asterisk next to their name.

Of course, this isn’t the case for the majority of businesses listed with this name, and most of them cheat with their small-town status. Carrie Bradshaw might be appalled, though she may face accusations of being comedically obtuse.

2. Lord of the Wings: Restaurant

Image Credit: Branislav Nenin/Shutterstock.

Strangely, the first title that came to mind here for me was Lord of the Flies. Then, it dawned on me that it was following J.R.R. Tolkien’s classic. The Lebanese restaurant chain offers the obvious chicken choices, though with an added build-your-own-burger feature.

The title works so well; the imagery of Frodo and Samwise battling their way through Middle Earth has pure comedic value. Curiously, I was disappointed to see the wing menu uses generic terminology and doesn’t offer a super-hot “Wing of Power” special.

3. Florist Gump: Floral Services

Small business. Male florist unfocused in flower shop. Floral design studio, making decorations and arrangements. Flowers delivery, creating order
Image Credit: Shutterstock.

Florist Gumps have sprung up all over the world. The phrase “run, florist; run” must be a common inside joke in these establishments. With florists in Australia, the USA, and Scotland claiming this name, does Paramount Pictures have a bunch of cease-and-desist letters to write?

One might imagine they offer a box of chocolates special on Valentine’s Day — if they don’t, they need to. Should Florist Gump ever wish to go international, there would also be several cool marketing ideas. A florist running through America’s national parks, clutching a gorgeous bouquet, anyone?

4. The Codfather: Fish & Chip Restaurant

fish and chips
Image Credit: Shutterstock.

The great thing about this name is the word association and marketing possibilities — including one-liners from gangster movies. “I’m gonna make him an offer he can’t refuse,” for example, would work for a specials menu, though “He sleeps with the fishes,” may not.

It seems fried fish merchants from the Northern and Southern Hemispheres see the possibilities; vendors in South Africa, the Canary Islands, and Spain have all followed dozens of British businesses using the same name.

5. Thorassic Park: Chiropractors

Chiropractor
Image Credit: Shutterstock.

Bradenton, Florida, has some clever chiropractors who understand how signage works. In a bold rehaul of the world-famous Jurassic Park logo, they use a generic Leonardo Di Vinci’s “Vitruvian Man” behind their play on the word thoracic.

Thorassic Park is smart because the connotations for dinosaurs and fossilized bones make a perfect leap to helping people rejuvenate their old bones. Don’t let your bones go extinct; schedule a date at Thorassic Park.

6. Thai Tanic: Thai Restaurant

Image Credit: Slavica Stajic/Shutterstock.

It’s hard to know where the first Thai Tanic restaurant opened, considering how many Thai chefs use the name. All that matters is that Thai food is going down very well across America, Austria, and Northern Ireland — and every major city.

There is an elephant in the room here — the Titanic was iconic, yes. However, the ship is famous for being run by buffoons who let it sink into the North Atlantic Ocean — not the best connotation for a business keeping afloat.

7. Bodgit & Leggit: Home Restoration and Construction

Home, house, construction, worker, man, carpenter, tools, building
Image Credit: Virrage Images/Shutterstock.

The phrase “bodge it” is common vernacular in the United Kingdom, meaning to mess the job up. “Mate, you’ve bodged that,” is a sentence heard on construction sites all across the country. Moreover, “leg it” is a British slang phrasal verb meaning to run away from trouble — usually the authorities.

The Bodgit and Leggit wordplay also works because both words sound like generic English names. “Oi, Bodgit, let’s leg it — we’ve bodged this one!” said Leggit, gathering his tools.

8. Shack of Sit: Furniture Warehouse

Interior view of the RH Furniture store in Tivoli Village
Image Credit: Shutterstock.

It was a toss-up between this name and its English competitor, The Sofa King, which once advertised on its Northampton storefront the question, “Why Are My Prices Sofa King Low?” Locals weren’t impressed — they would not take this crude attack sitting down. Following a nine-year campaign from local groups, The Sofa King was ordered to remove the slogan from its premises.

So, the prize for the most awkward store name goes to the double-take-inducing “Shack of Sit,” a furniture company from New Zealand. Amusingly, I can only read this title in a Kiwi accent, which sounds closer to “Shick of Soot,” making it even funnier.

9. Perky Blenders: Coffee Company

Image Credit: Shutterstock.

The winner of Simply Business’s yearly poll for the funniest British small business name in 2022 was a specialty coffee company in East London called Perky Blenders, a reference to the powerful BBC drama Peaky Blinders.

Offering coffee club subscriptions and high-end roasted on-site coffee blends, this hipster spot is fast becoming a favorite hangout for London’s East End brew lovers. Sadly, they don’t dress as their inspiration — or try to do the Birmingham accent like everyone else who loves the series.

10. The Air of the Dog: Inflatable Pop-up Bars

The Air of the Dog Blow up bars
Image Credit: The Air of the Dog.

At first glance, The Air of the Dog might seem like a typo for a doggy grooming company, though that would ignore the genius behind the title and the concept. The Air of the Dog is an inflatable bar company specializing in pop-up events and celebrations.

As some may know, the “hair” of the dog signifies drinking liquor in the morning after a heavy night’s indulgence. One can only imagine the business owners’ delight when they stumbled upon this astute, alliterative name.

11. Bread Pitt: Baked Goods

Image Credit: Master1305/Shutterstock.

It is hard to go wrong with a celebrity endorsement. We can’t be sure Hollywood superstar Brad Pitt gave his blessing to this Croatian bakery, but if he were to visit Croatia’s capital, he might enjoy its yeast-based namesake.

You don’t get the body of a Greek god without forsaking leaven bread; though surely he would be tempted by the comedy value of Brad Pitt eating at Bread Pitt. Those Croatians must dream of the day Brad visits Zagreb.

12. Back to the Fuschia: Floral Boutique

Florist
Image Credit: direct2Florist – CC BY 2.0/Wiki Commons.

One of the more curious parts of discovering funny business names is seeing where they originate. It becomes a case of trying to decide which came first or whether it’s a mere case of great minds thinking alike. In the case of Back to the Fuschia, the more prominent business address belongs to a local floral boutique in Saugatuck, Michigan.

Pleasingly for Brits with a dry sense of humor, the other branch is in Milton Keynes, United Kingdom, a town famous for its dullness. Its most famous identifying trait is a concrete cow sculpture designed by an American artist in 1978, which has been vandalized so much it ended up in the Milton Keynes Museum.

13. Bread Zeppelin: Salad Restaurant

Homemade Autumn Apple Walnut Spinach Salad with Cheese and Cranberries
Image Credit: Shutterstock.

We see your Bread Pitt and raise you one Bread Zeppelin. Before unpacking this Texas chain’s name, we must warn that while bread is a prominent part of this business, its “Salads Elevated” slogan is confusing.

A Bread Zeppelin is a genius new sandwich method involving a hollowed-out demi-baguette stuffed with a variety of healthy replacement salad ingredients. Curiously, the legendary English rock band is nowhere to be seen, which will be an anti-climax for some customers.

14. Frying Nemo: Fish & Chip Restaurant

Fish and chips on the seafront at Hunstanton, Norfolk UK. In this instance the fish is deep fried plaice.
Image Credit: Andrew Dunn – CCA SA 2.0/WikiCommons.

Disclaimer: We do not endorse cruelty to Pixar characters. However, those Brits are up to it again with their fish & chip shops and Frying Nemo, one of the shadier selections. Thankfully for poor Nemo, he is in good pans (hands — sorry).

Yorkshire is renowned in the United Kingdom as a great place for fish & chips, though not if you love clown fish. Disclaimer #2: Frying Nemo does not serve clown fish — more likely cod, haddock, and plaice.

15. Tequila Mockingbird: Mexican Restaurant

Mexican Food
Image Credit: Shutterstock.

While this could be a good dive bar name, it’s commonly used for Mexican restaurants worldwide, and some might argue it shows little imagination. Maybe an improvement is possible with a Mockingbird theme to complement the serving staff’s duties.

I would personally love to visit a restaurant where orders are met with a sarcastic, mocking voice to confirm the order. Think Karen’s Diner but with a snarky accent. “Oh, you want burritos, do you?”

16. Iron Maiden: Ironing Services

Iron on Ironing board with shirts
Image Credit: Shutterstock.

Before checking the geographical location of this business name, we can safely assume it is Britain once more. The pioneering heavy metal band Iron Maiden was founded in East London. However, one must ask how far these companies go.

Whether it’s a fabric ironing or dry cleaning service, two additions would give it character — Iron Maiden played on a loop over the sound system all day, and perhaps a joke clock set at “2 Minutes to Midnight” like the band’s hit song.

17. Indiana Jeans: Outdoor Wear

Family of four on a hike in the fall.
Image Credit: Shutterstock.

In Montreal, Canada, a denim vendor one day stumbled upon a world-class brand for their Western jeans and boots business: Indiana Jeans. For anyone unfamiliar with the movie, the name may just sound like jeans manufactured in Indiana. Still, they would be missing out on a clever piece of marketing.

The store sells bull hide pinch-front hats and leather cowboy boots alongside its denim collection. Outdoor adventure is in perfect harmony with the Indiana Jones theme — just don’t expect any snakeskin products.

18. Jabba the Cutt: Barbers

Barber
Image Credit: Mostafameraji – Own work, CC BY-SA 4.0/Wiki Commons.

In a side street far, far away from any major English city is Jabba the Cutt Master Barber in Truro, deepest Cornwall, down on the British Isles’ southernmost nether regions. This is a fantastic name, if somewhat misguided.

Perhaps they could have gone with “Luke Style-Walker,” which makes the connection to his youthful locks rather than Jabba the Hutt’s rancid lumps. In any case, there is one glaring error — on the front window is the head of Boba Fett. Maybe they are referencing his eventual takeover of Jabba’s Tatooine kingdom?

19. Darth Vaper: Smoking Products

Smoke
Image Credit: Geek Nexus.

The Force is strong in the business world. In perfect Star Wars-esque type font, another British store (what is it with these Brits and comedy business names?) embraces its dark side with Darth Vaper. One suspects there is no direct link to the Vader brand; this is merely a plan to attract vape-happy Star Wars fans.

However, this play on words likely has some unintended irony — the trait most moviegoers associate with Darth Vader is his wheezy breathing, which may not be the best look for a vaping service.

20. Bottoms Up: Colonic Services

Image Credit: Shutterstock.

You can imagine strolling through town, chancing upon Bottoms Up’s front window, and assuming it was a humble wine bar. Then, after another look, the joke would break when you realized it wasn’t a liquor-based enterprise but a colonic irrigation clinic.

However, the smile might then turn to a grimace as the imagery associated with the title starts assaulting your mind. Then again, this is such a comedic name that if one needed colonic irrigation, the novelty factor alone could sell it.

21. Avril Living: Furniture

A dining room table and chairs display at a West Elm Midcentury Modern furniture store in Orlando, Florida
Image Credit: Shutterstock.

It isn’t clear where the Avril Living Interiors and Furniture retailers are, nor is it certain whether the proprietors meant the humorous name. In any case, an X (formerly Twitter) account named Punny Business published a random photo of the store in 2015.

The last many heard of Avril Lavigne — other than 2022’s Love Sux — involved the “Avril Replacement” conspiracy theory that she died in 2003 and has since been played by an imposter. Of course, these rumors are silly — the real Avril has been part of the music industry “furniture” for decades now.

22. Mata Doors: Security Doors

Door lock installation, repair, or replacement
Image Credit: Shutterstock.

When people decide to buy a security door, they invariably think about strength and durability. The Mata Door wordplay is acceptable, though it straddles the line between two-word associations.

With such a name, customers will either think of a fearsome beast that can smash through most materials or a dashing artist who can tempt the bull into a deadly near-miss — the latter is the winner. Then there is the linguistic misnomer — in Spanish, “Mata Door” could mean to murder a door.

23. Spruce Springsteen: Carpet Cleaning

Carpet Cleaning
Image Credit: Shutterstock.

There will be Muppets fans familiar with Spruce Springsteen; he was a one-off character designed for the 1988 Night of 100 Trees event, where he auctioned off celebrity-decorated trees for charity. However, this was not Cornish carpet cleaning business owner Alan Collins’ inspiration.

Speaking in a Wales Online feature, Collins explains how he heard a local radio disc jockey introduce a Bruce Springsteen song. “I misheard him and thought he said, ‘Spruce Springsteen’,” says the carpet cleaner, who later used the phrase for his new business. Spruce your carpets up with Spruce Springsteen!

24. Jack the Chipper: Fish and Chips

Fish and Chips, British Food
Image Credit: Platdujour – Own work, CC BY-SA 4.0/Wiki Commons.

British fish and chip shops (which are usually takeout joints) have a monopoly on catchy names. Frying Nemo to The Codfather aside, we now reference serial killers of yesteryear — East London’s Jack the Ripper.

Many Americans will scratch their heads at first, wondering whether they sell potato chips or wood-chipping machines. However, chips are the British word for french fries, and the East London connection to fish and chips is also a nice touch.

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